"If you can do a half-assed job at anything, you're a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind."
-- Kurt Vonnegut
In business and sports and education, the pundits are always crying out for excellence and quality. Nothing wrong with that. It's hard to argue against excellence and quality. But what about those of us who just aren't up to it? What about those of us who are not superstars or Rhodes Scholars or wunderkind, techno-billionaires?
Ah, don't dismay, there's still hope. As curmudgeonly, old Kurt so graciously pointed out, all it takes is a half-assed job to be much more successful than your average blind schmuck, who, buy the way, makes up, far and away, the majority of the population.
So, is the pursuit of greatness wearing you down? Forget about it! Claw your way up to mediocrity, and you'll do just fine. Enjoy surpassing the masses and quit comparing yourself to the rich, talented, beautiful people that the press seems so fixated upon. Flying under the radar of public acclaim pretty much guarantees you'll never be shot down.
Anything worth doing is worth doing half-assed. If you tried to be excellent at everything you did, you just wouldn't have time to do much of anything. You'd be a one trick pony who could play top notch classical violin, and that's about it. Or you'd be a chess champ or a theoretical physicist, or the world's number one expert on the nursing habits of the duck-billed platypus. But you sure wouldn't have time for all that farting around that you like to do so much. You wouldn't have time for aimlessly wandering the beach, or surfing the Internet, or drinking beer with your buds, or watching Casablanca for the umpteenth time.
Be a half ass and be proud. Half asses rule! Who wants to be a whole ass anyway?
The Golden Radiance of Close Attention
"Stein writes about ordinary objects in unremarkable lives -- lawn mowers and Dodge pickups, TV sets and baseball caps -- but upon that humble stuff, he sheds the golden radiance of close attention."
-- Julia Keller. Writing about Illinois State Poet, Kevin Stein, in the Chicago Tribune 1/24/09.
I love that phrase "the golden radiance of close attention." I've read it now at least a dozen times, and it still gives me goose bumps on each re-reading.
Our lives are filled with humble objects and ordinary stuff, and yet each and every item is redeemed by "the golden radiance of close attention." (I can't stop saying it! I think I'll ask Julia Keller if she minds if I use it for the title of a book I've yet to write. It may be a book on how to fix your Honda Accord; it may be a book of poetry. Who cares? Either way the title would apply).
Let's face it: Most of us live pretty ordinary, unremarkable lives. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just that at times we get a bad case of the discontents and dream and long for glamor and beauty and money and power. We think that if we just had ____ (fill in the blank), life would be perfect and oh so grand.
It ain't going to happen. Not likely, at least. What is going to happen is that we're going to shovel snow and watch the Super Bowl and make dinner and try and balance our checkbooks, and a million and one other little things, that strung together make up our lives. But each of these trite, little, mundane acts is a semi-precious jewel waiting to be discovered. Waiting to be unearthed by the redeeming light of attention. Waiting to be seen for what it is -- a shining holographic slice of life that both contains, and is a doorway to, the All and Everything.
Who knew, that the slice of bacon before you is a portal to the Divine? Who'd have guessed that the old Rolling Stones T-shirt that you refuse to throw out is as sacred as the Shroud of Turin?
You see, the Spirit abides in the details of even the most ordinary life. No icey trek in the Himalayas required. No zapping on the road to Damascus. No years beneath a bodhi tree. Right here, right now, the most mundane objects and actions come alive and shine through "the golden radiance of close attention."
And so, if you bestow attention on the little things on even a semi-regular basis, you soon realize that what you have here is a golden, radiant life. Golden attention, golden moments, golden life -- who could ask for anything more?
-- Julia Keller. Writing about Illinois State Poet, Kevin Stein, in the Chicago Tribune 1/24/09.
I love that phrase "the golden radiance of close attention." I've read it now at least a dozen times, and it still gives me goose bumps on each re-reading.
Our lives are filled with humble objects and ordinary stuff, and yet each and every item is redeemed by "the golden radiance of close attention." (I can't stop saying it! I think I'll ask Julia Keller if she minds if I use it for the title of a book I've yet to write. It may be a book on how to fix your Honda Accord; it may be a book of poetry. Who cares? Either way the title would apply).
Let's face it: Most of us live pretty ordinary, unremarkable lives. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just that at times we get a bad case of the discontents and dream and long for glamor and beauty and money and power. We think that if we just had ____ (fill in the blank), life would be perfect and oh so grand.
It ain't going to happen. Not likely, at least. What is going to happen is that we're going to shovel snow and watch the Super Bowl and make dinner and try and balance our checkbooks, and a million and one other little things, that strung together make up our lives. But each of these trite, little, mundane acts is a semi-precious jewel waiting to be discovered. Waiting to be unearthed by the redeeming light of attention. Waiting to be seen for what it is -- a shining holographic slice of life that both contains, and is a doorway to, the All and Everything.
Who knew, that the slice of bacon before you is a portal to the Divine? Who'd have guessed that the old Rolling Stones T-shirt that you refuse to throw out is as sacred as the Shroud of Turin?
You see, the Spirit abides in the details of even the most ordinary life. No icey trek in the Himalayas required. No zapping on the road to Damascus. No years beneath a bodhi tree. Right here, right now, the most mundane objects and actions come alive and shine through "the golden radiance of close attention."
And so, if you bestow attention on the little things on even a semi-regular basis, you soon realize that what you have here is a golden, radiant life. Golden attention, golden moments, golden life -- who could ask for anything more?
Three Instructions
"The Three Instructions:
Be Yourself.
Question Stressful Thoughts
Keep the Channel Open."
-- Molly Gordon. The Way of the Accidental Entrepreneur.
I love it when things come in threes! Threes are easy to remember, have a certain symmetry, and hey, how hard can it be to do just three things? Well, in this case, maybe a bit more difficult than it appears upon first blush.
Be yourself. Of course I'm myself -- who the hell else could I be? But am I being my deepest, most authentic self, or am I just lazily adopting a persona that is as comfortable as an old shoe, and even less functional and attractive? True, your self has many facets, but you know in your heart of hearts which components are of the essence and which are cultural overlays. Nourish the former, jettison the latter.
"The economy is in the shitter, and I'm going to lose my job and starve!" That's a stressful thought. But with just a modicum of questioning, it's easy to see its lack of plausibility. You aren't going to starve -- you'll be a dumpster-diving, jug-wine drinking bag lady. Ooops, another stressful thought!
In reality, most stressful thoughts are subtle. They eat away at us, especially when they're on an endless loop. They are the type of thoughts that question our personal worth, the goodness of others, the beauty of the world. Many times these thoughts propose absurd catastrophic expectations.
Whenever you catch yourself in Stressful Thoughtville, question the veracity of the thought. Is it likely, is it even knowable, is it useful? Most stressful thoughts will get three resounding no's! Drop them like you'd drop OJ Simpson from your wedding guest list, and move on.
Finally, continually open and re-open your channel to the Divine. Let the energy of the Universe course into you and through you. Become like a hollow bamboo through which the Divine can flow. That openness will wash away all stressful thoughts. That openness will lead you to your true self.
Be - Question - Open. Three simple things to do. Three powerful ways to explore, expand and experience the real you.
Be Yourself.
Question Stressful Thoughts
Keep the Channel Open."
-- Molly Gordon. The Way of the Accidental Entrepreneur.
I love it when things come in threes! Threes are easy to remember, have a certain symmetry, and hey, how hard can it be to do just three things? Well, in this case, maybe a bit more difficult than it appears upon first blush.
Be yourself. Of course I'm myself -- who the hell else could I be? But am I being my deepest, most authentic self, or am I just lazily adopting a persona that is as comfortable as an old shoe, and even less functional and attractive? True, your self has many facets, but you know in your heart of hearts which components are of the essence and which are cultural overlays. Nourish the former, jettison the latter.
"The economy is in the shitter, and I'm going to lose my job and starve!" That's a stressful thought. But with just a modicum of questioning, it's easy to see its lack of plausibility. You aren't going to starve -- you'll be a dumpster-diving, jug-wine drinking bag lady. Ooops, another stressful thought!
In reality, most stressful thoughts are subtle. They eat away at us, especially when they're on an endless loop. They are the type of thoughts that question our personal worth, the goodness of others, the beauty of the world. Many times these thoughts propose absurd catastrophic expectations.
Whenever you catch yourself in Stressful Thoughtville, question the veracity of the thought. Is it likely, is it even knowable, is it useful? Most stressful thoughts will get three resounding no's! Drop them like you'd drop OJ Simpson from your wedding guest list, and move on.
Finally, continually open and re-open your channel to the Divine. Let the energy of the Universe course into you and through you. Become like a hollow bamboo through which the Divine can flow. That openness will wash away all stressful thoughts. That openness will lead you to your true self.
Be - Question - Open. Three simple things to do. Three powerful ways to explore, expand and experience the real you.
Let It Come to You
"You can't go chasin' life all over tarnation. You got to set back and let it come to you. Stay in one place long enough and most everythang'll come by at least once."
-- Rancid Crabtree. From the story Sequences by Patrick McManus
Pursuit gets some high cred in our culture. Pursue your goals, pursue your dreams, chase what matters. But what about the second law of thermodynamics -- for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction? What if the truth is that what you pursue, flees you? Then what good is all this running around chasing your tail business? Rancid thinks it's no good, no good at all.
Imagine sitting back, relaxing, abiding in the present moment. Nowhere to go, nothing to pursue. Whatever the Universe offers, you gladly accept, but you chase after nothing, jones for nada. Whatever comes, you let it come. Whatever goes, you let it go. Detached awareness, equanimity.
That is the spiritual path of Rancid Crabtree, as well as that of many great spiritual traditions, including Taoism and Buddhism. All this hyper- activity that we think leads to accomplishment, and ultimately, hopefully happiness, is seen as mere busyness. Can you be happy right here, right now? That is the only real question worth asking.
Because if you can't, you've taken the Ginzu Knife of desire and sliced the world completely in two. Not only have you created unhappy time (now) versus happy time (somewhere in the future), but also you have cleaved the world into two distinct and separate groups -- those who have what it takes to achieve happiness and those who don't. We are no longer One. We are competitors locked in a dualistic battle for the golden ring of happiness.
No thanks. I think I'll sit this one out. And as I sit here, I'll watch. I'll watch for whatever will "come by at least once." And I'll be happy. Damn right I'll be happy! And grateful. Grateful that I no longer believe in the myth of achieved happiness. Happy to be here at all.
-- Rancid Crabtree. From the story Sequences by Patrick McManus
Pursuit gets some high cred in our culture. Pursue your goals, pursue your dreams, chase what matters. But what about the second law of thermodynamics -- for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction? What if the truth is that what you pursue, flees you? Then what good is all this running around chasing your tail business? Rancid thinks it's no good, no good at all.
Imagine sitting back, relaxing, abiding in the present moment. Nowhere to go, nothing to pursue. Whatever the Universe offers, you gladly accept, but you chase after nothing, jones for nada. Whatever comes, you let it come. Whatever goes, you let it go. Detached awareness, equanimity.
That is the spiritual path of Rancid Crabtree, as well as that of many great spiritual traditions, including Taoism and Buddhism. All this hyper- activity that we think leads to accomplishment, and ultimately, hopefully happiness, is seen as mere busyness. Can you be happy right here, right now? That is the only real question worth asking.
Because if you can't, you've taken the Ginzu Knife of desire and sliced the world completely in two. Not only have you created unhappy time (now) versus happy time (somewhere in the future), but also you have cleaved the world into two distinct and separate groups -- those who have what it takes to achieve happiness and those who don't. We are no longer One. We are competitors locked in a dualistic battle for the golden ring of happiness.
No thanks. I think I'll sit this one out. And as I sit here, I'll watch. I'll watch for whatever will "come by at least once." And I'll be happy. Damn right I'll be happy! And grateful. Grateful that I no longer believe in the myth of achieved happiness. Happy to be here at all.
Don't look!
"The devil inside
The devil inside
Every single one of us the devil inside"
-- INXS song lyrics
Don't get me wrong. I don't really believe in a red dude with a long tail and horns who answers to the name Satan. What I do notice, not believe, is that we all have some negativity in our souls. Call it the Devil, call it evil, call it Dick Chaney. It doesn't matter what you call it, it's an energy that is harbored within the dark side of each of us.
It's there. We know it. But there's no good reason to spend any time looking at it, feeding it, or giving it energy and attention. Sure, you and old Beelzebub may get into an occasional wrestling match or two during your dark nights of the soul, but that's your own personal business. No one can wrestle the Red Man for you. And any evil lurking in the hearts of others is their business. No rubber necking, please.
Evil is a fascinating phenomena. And it comes in so many creative guises and disguises. Our job, though, our path, if you will, no matter what your religion may be, is to choose love. When we look at others, we are looking for the best and brightest light that they can shine. We are looking beyond appearance to essence, beyond persona to Spirt.
And the more we choose to focus on Spirit, on love, rather than upon evil, the freer we are. We are free because Spirit itself is always already free, and we are It. We may have evil, but we are Spirit. As is everyone.
And so when we notice a tail under the priest's cloak, or the cold metal shine in the teacher's eye, or just the common, everyday examples of greed and pettiness that cross our path, we turn away. We turn away not from the person, just from the negativity. We turn away not in anger but in gratitude. Gratitude for the fact that we have the strength, the discernment, the heart to choose to see all the positive things that a person is and can be.
That is our freedom -- not to be compelled, constrained or controlled by evil, not to mistake it as Real, but to see all and everything, everyone, as Spirit incarnate.
Our whole business...
"Our whole business, therefore, in this life, is to restore to health the eye of the heart whereby God may be seen."
-- St. Augustine
Where do you see God? If your answer wasn't "everywhere," you, like me, have some work to do.
Sure, it's nice to see God in nature and in babies and in the saintly acts of others. But what about seeing God in whiskey-breathed panhandlers who get right up in your face, in stone-hearted old women who practically snarl and hiss at you in line at the grocery, in the shallow, bubble-headed teenagers who laugh like hyenas at stuff that isn't even funny. And I could go on and on. Can we see God in those whose behavior seems far from God-like? That's the real, acid test.
The "eye of the heart" is clouded by hurt, desire, and fear. We develop what Eckhart Tolle has termed "the pain body." The pain body is an emotional constellation that keeps us self-obsessed and unable to see the Divine, both in us and around us. Clearing the pain body, cleansing the eye of the heart allows us to really see that all is sacred, that there is nothing outside the Divine.
Be careful, though. Years ago, in my early twenties, while sitting in a coffee shop I decide that I would not leave the shop until I could see God in the each one of the 20 or so people seated there. Some people were easy. They had a smile, a look, or a gentle manner that easily and graciously expressed something greater. One woman though was a bitch! She was this sassy, loud, brash waitress who just totally rubbed me the wrong way. It took me almost as much time to see God in her as it did to see the Divine in the other 20 folks combined!
But here's the kicker. After I did finally see God in her, I fell totally in love with her! And she with me. And we lived together for two wild, tumultuous years which were kind of like relationship boot camp for both of us. I'm convinced the whole relationship never would have happened had I not undertaken that little cleansing the eye of the heart exercise back in the coffee shop. I don't regret it, not a bit. But it sure was a powerful exercise!
In a very real sense, seeing God in everyone is the entire spiritual path. I may meditate or read spiritual texts or attend worship services or whatever, but all of those practices are preliminaries, a means to an end. And the end? Seeing God right here, right now, in everyone and everything, ever and always, the eye of the heart clear and shining. One practice, one people, on heart, one God. One and only in all and every. That's it. All of it. Our whole business.
-- St. Augustine
Where do you see God? If your answer wasn't "everywhere," you, like me, have some work to do.
Sure, it's nice to see God in nature and in babies and in the saintly acts of others. But what about seeing God in whiskey-breathed panhandlers who get right up in your face, in stone-hearted old women who practically snarl and hiss at you in line at the grocery, in the shallow, bubble-headed teenagers who laugh like hyenas at stuff that isn't even funny. And I could go on and on. Can we see God in those whose behavior seems far from God-like? That's the real, acid test.
The "eye of the heart" is clouded by hurt, desire, and fear. We develop what Eckhart Tolle has termed "the pain body." The pain body is an emotional constellation that keeps us self-obsessed and unable to see the Divine, both in us and around us. Clearing the pain body, cleansing the eye of the heart allows us to really see that all is sacred, that there is nothing outside the Divine.
Be careful, though. Years ago, in my early twenties, while sitting in a coffee shop I decide that I would not leave the shop until I could see God in the each one of the 20 or so people seated there. Some people were easy. They had a smile, a look, or a gentle manner that easily and graciously expressed something greater. One woman though was a bitch! She was this sassy, loud, brash waitress who just totally rubbed me the wrong way. It took me almost as much time to see God in her as it did to see the Divine in the other 20 folks combined!
But here's the kicker. After I did finally see God in her, I fell totally in love with her! And she with me. And we lived together for two wild, tumultuous years which were kind of like relationship boot camp for both of us. I'm convinced the whole relationship never would have happened had I not undertaken that little cleansing the eye of the heart exercise back in the coffee shop. I don't regret it, not a bit. But it sure was a powerful exercise!
In a very real sense, seeing God in everyone is the entire spiritual path. I may meditate or read spiritual texts or attend worship services or whatever, but all of those practices are preliminaries, a means to an end. And the end? Seeing God right here, right now, in everyone and everything, ever and always, the eye of the heart clear and shining. One practice, one people, on heart, one God. One and only in all and every. That's it. All of it. Our whole business.
The Wisdom of Happiness
Be happy. It is one way of being wise."
-- Colette
Happiness is a choice. A choice you make each day, each hour, each moment.
Being happy begins with saying "yes" to life. It is built on accepting what is and reveling in it. Every time you choose not to be happy, you are choosing to reject Reality. In a sense, you are saying to God, "If I were in your shoes Big Guy, things would be different around here."
Happiness is not some frivolous, bubble-headed emotion. It is part and parcel of who you are at the deepest level. It is the life force coursing through you, and out into the world through your actions, your words, your smile, your eyes.
The wisdom of happiness knows that there is no way that in this very moment things could be any different than what they are. It also knows that the next moment is wide open, and that things can change on a dime. The happy-wise amongst us, enjoy the ride, even though they know not when it will end.
Today, happiness awaits you. No, the Publisher's Clearinghouse Prize Patrol will probably not show up on your porch with that gobzillion dollar check, and it is highly unlikely that the star or starlet of your dreams will drop by your office for an afternoon delight, but happiness awaits nonetheless. It awaits between your ears. It awaits in your heart. It's not pushy. It's not waving its hand squealing "Choose me, choose me!" It quietly abides, waiting for you to tire of the melodrama of lesser emotions.
Today is National Happiness Day! OK, I just made that up. But it should be. And so should tomorrow, and the next day, and on and on, round and round, one big firggin' merry-go-round of happiness. Your ticket to ride is your power of choice. What better time to use it than now?
-- Colette
Happiness is a choice. A choice you make each day, each hour, each moment.
Being happy begins with saying "yes" to life. It is built on accepting what is and reveling in it. Every time you choose not to be happy, you are choosing to reject Reality. In a sense, you are saying to God, "If I were in your shoes Big Guy, things would be different around here."
Happiness is not some frivolous, bubble-headed emotion. It is part and parcel of who you are at the deepest level. It is the life force coursing through you, and out into the world through your actions, your words, your smile, your eyes.
The wisdom of happiness knows that there is no way that in this very moment things could be any different than what they are. It also knows that the next moment is wide open, and that things can change on a dime. The happy-wise amongst us, enjoy the ride, even though they know not when it will end.
Today, happiness awaits you. No, the Publisher's Clearinghouse Prize Patrol will probably not show up on your porch with that gobzillion dollar check, and it is highly unlikely that the star or starlet of your dreams will drop by your office for an afternoon delight, but happiness awaits nonetheless. It awaits between your ears. It awaits in your heart. It's not pushy. It's not waving its hand squealing "Choose me, choose me!" It quietly abides, waiting for you to tire of the melodrama of lesser emotions.
Today is National Happiness Day! OK, I just made that up. But it should be. And so should tomorrow, and the next day, and on and on, round and round, one big firggin' merry-go-round of happiness. Your ticket to ride is your power of choice. What better time to use it than now?
Your Inner Asshole
"I can only understand and love you when I accept me. I can only live life without bitterness when I accept me. When I accept the ashole within me, the entire world becomes saints."
-- Ananda Abinou
Sure, you've got God within you. That inner spark of the Divine may be small, but it burns oh so brightly. Every yogi worth his loin cloth, every Christ worth his cross has told you that. And still you don't believe it, you don't live as if you and the Primordial Ground of Being are One.
So, let's try a different approach. You may not be able to accept your own divinity, but if you're truly honest with yourself, you know there are times when you're a real asshole! You know, those times when ego takes over, when you are far less than loving, when you hold a grudge, or judge others harshly, or eat the last piece of chocolate when you've already had more than your share. Let's capitalize on that insight into your lesser qualities. Let's enter the Divine through the back door. Let's head straight to Heaven through your inner asshole!
It's simple: You look at the worst of your behavior and learn to accept it. Simple, not necessarily easy. Whatever you've thought, done, or felt does not define you. You let it go, and lo and behold, you're still standing. Accepting your worst behavior does not mean that you indulge it, though. Truly seeing it takes you through it and beyond it. Then, you, too, will be on the road to the World of Saints that Ananda talks about above.
You avoid your Light because it shines too bright. You avoid your darkness because it's way too scary. But sometimes there is a certain comfort in the dark. It is at least familiar. And so you enter it. When you do, you have entered the Path of the Inner Asshole. When you accept yourself completely -- all the warts, pimples, and blemishes on your soul -- you also can accept others completely, accept the world completely. And then, everyone is a saint, all of life is divine.
Sure, you've come in through the back door. Who cares? Take a shower, relax. You're home.
-- Ananda Abinou
Sure, you've got God within you. That inner spark of the Divine may be small, but it burns oh so brightly. Every yogi worth his loin cloth, every Christ worth his cross has told you that. And still you don't believe it, you don't live as if you and the Primordial Ground of Being are One.
So, let's try a different approach. You may not be able to accept your own divinity, but if you're truly honest with yourself, you know there are times when you're a real asshole! You know, those times when ego takes over, when you are far less than loving, when you hold a grudge, or judge others harshly, or eat the last piece of chocolate when you've already had more than your share. Let's capitalize on that insight into your lesser qualities. Let's enter the Divine through the back door. Let's head straight to Heaven through your inner asshole!
It's simple: You look at the worst of your behavior and learn to accept it. Simple, not necessarily easy. Whatever you've thought, done, or felt does not define you. You let it go, and lo and behold, you're still standing. Accepting your worst behavior does not mean that you indulge it, though. Truly seeing it takes you through it and beyond it. Then, you, too, will be on the road to the World of Saints that Ananda talks about above.
You avoid your Light because it shines too bright. You avoid your darkness because it's way too scary. But sometimes there is a certain comfort in the dark. It is at least familiar. And so you enter it. When you do, you have entered the Path of the Inner Asshole. When you accept yourself completely -- all the warts, pimples, and blemishes on your soul -- you also can accept others completely, accept the world completely. And then, everyone is a saint, all of life is divine.
Sure, you've come in through the back door. Who cares? Take a shower, relax. You're home.
Beware of Friends!
"Friends are to be feared not so much for what they make us do as for what they keep us from doing."
-- Henrik Ibsen
Your friends know you. All too well. They know your dysfunctional behaviors, your self-imposed boundaries, your self-defeating habits, and they support you in maintaining them. They love you just the way you are. And that is the crux of the problem.
Your friends laugh with you. They smile at you. They cut you some slack and they encourage you to settle into your comfort zone. They like you. They like their relationship with you. The last thing they want you to do is change and grow and leave them eating your dust!
And so, no, they're not tying you down or physically holding you back, but they are subtly binding you to your past, to your previously chosen limits. Your comfort zone is their comfort zone, too. Save the boat rockin' for another day. The status quo is oh so fine.
So, love your friends and transcend them. Don't leave them, inspire them. Be more than they think you can be, do more than they think you can do. Surprise them. Startle them. Shock them into seeing you, and the world, through new eyes.
Old friends, new you. New ways of being, old hearts sill beating. Each day a new adventure. The old you is dead. Long live the new you!
-- Henrik Ibsen
Your friends know you. All too well. They know your dysfunctional behaviors, your self-imposed boundaries, your self-defeating habits, and they support you in maintaining them. They love you just the way you are. And that is the crux of the problem.
Your friends laugh with you. They smile at you. They cut you some slack and they encourage you to settle into your comfort zone. They like you. They like their relationship with you. The last thing they want you to do is change and grow and leave them eating your dust!
And so, no, they're not tying you down or physically holding you back, but they are subtly binding you to your past, to your previously chosen limits. Your comfort zone is their comfort zone, too. Save the boat rockin' for another day. The status quo is oh so fine.
So, love your friends and transcend them. Don't leave them, inspire them. Be more than they think you can be, do more than they think you can do. Surprise them. Startle them. Shock them into seeing you, and the world, through new eyes.
Old friends, new you. New ways of being, old hearts sill beating. Each day a new adventure. The old you is dead. Long live the new you!
Nothing
"I expect nothing. I demand nothing. I refuse nothing."
-- Nisargadatta Maharaj
Imagine living your life without expectations, without demands, and with total acceptance. Can you do it? Not the living -- just the imagining. Even imagining such a life is hard for me to do because our expectations, demands and refusals are so subtle and insidious.
We enter each day with expectations, be they grand, catastrophic, or somewhere in between. We may not think of ourselves as demanding, but all our wishes are just wimpy demands. Everytime we think that reality "should" be different than it is, we are being psychologically demanding, even if we don't manifest those demands verbally. And don't even get me started on refusal! Not only do we refuse so much of what life offers us -- from free drinks to life lessons, form laughter to the beauties of nature -- we refuse to even notice the opportunities placed before us daily, and instead complain about the economy, the weather, our partners, or the ineptitude of our favorite sports teams.
Imagining a life sans expectations, demands and refusals is the first step. Then make one day, perhaps today, a day to gather data. Keep count of exactly the times throughout the day you find yourself expecting, demanding and refusing. Don't try and change your behavior one iota, just keep track of those three things. This will give you a baseline reading, show you the scope of the challenge that Maharaj's nine small words represent.
Finally, let go! Let go of E, D & R. See what life is like when you accept it on its own terms rather than compel it to remake itself in your image. You may be surprised. You may find letting go of these three powerful patterns damn near impossible to do. At least at first.
But then, if you keep at it, you may discover that reality is not such a bad thing after all, and that you have much more energy to enjoy it when you are no longer in a battle with it. First be E, D, & R free, then just see.
-- Nisargadatta Maharaj
Imagine living your life without expectations, without demands, and with total acceptance. Can you do it? Not the living -- just the imagining. Even imagining such a life is hard for me to do because our expectations, demands and refusals are so subtle and insidious.
We enter each day with expectations, be they grand, catastrophic, or somewhere in between. We may not think of ourselves as demanding, but all our wishes are just wimpy demands. Everytime we think that reality "should" be different than it is, we are being psychologically demanding, even if we don't manifest those demands verbally. And don't even get me started on refusal! Not only do we refuse so much of what life offers us -- from free drinks to life lessons, form laughter to the beauties of nature -- we refuse to even notice the opportunities placed before us daily, and instead complain about the economy, the weather, our partners, or the ineptitude of our favorite sports teams.
Imagining a life sans expectations, demands and refusals is the first step. Then make one day, perhaps today, a day to gather data. Keep count of exactly the times throughout the day you find yourself expecting, demanding and refusing. Don't try and change your behavior one iota, just keep track of those three things. This will give you a baseline reading, show you the scope of the challenge that Maharaj's nine small words represent.
Finally, let go! Let go of E, D & R. See what life is like when you accept it on its own terms rather than compel it to remake itself in your image. You may be surprised. You may find letting go of these three powerful patterns damn near impossible to do. At least at first.
But then, if you keep at it, you may discover that reality is not such a bad thing after all, and that you have much more energy to enjoy it when you are no longer in a battle with it. First be E, D, & R free, then just see.
Seek Not
"If you know that fundamentally there is nothing to seek, you have settled your affairs."
-- Rinzai
Zen masters have a way of just cutting to the chase, don't they? No seeking, no attaining, just is-ness.
And yet, even as the truth of Rinzai's statement reverberates within us, we find ourselves time and time again back in the role of seeker. We dupe ourselves with trumped up desires, with thoughts that we need this or that thing, relationship, accomplishment or experience in order to be happy, fulfilled, enlightened or whole. I guess we need something to fill the days, hours and years. But that something can, of course, be creating, sharing, loving rather than seeking.
The problem with being caught in the seeking cycle is that separates us, at least mentally, from Reality. Instead of reveling in what is right before us, we jones after fantasies of the good life. This is the good life! Or, as Carly Simon sings, "these are the good old days." Nothing need be added because nothing is missing. Nothing. Very Zen!
When lost in the cycle of seeking, when tossed by waves of desire, breath is a lifeline. Focus on the rise and and fall of your stomach -- breathing in, breathing out. You don't have to seek to breathe; breathing just happens. As does your life. As does Reality. Right here, right now the breath of life, all of life, all in this moment free of seeking. Who could ask for anything more?
-- Rinzai
Zen masters have a way of just cutting to the chase, don't they? No seeking, no attaining, just is-ness.
And yet, even as the truth of Rinzai's statement reverberates within us, we find ourselves time and time again back in the role of seeker. We dupe ourselves with trumped up desires, with thoughts that we need this or that thing, relationship, accomplishment or experience in order to be happy, fulfilled, enlightened or whole. I guess we need something to fill the days, hours and years. But that something can, of course, be creating, sharing, loving rather than seeking.
The problem with being caught in the seeking cycle is that separates us, at least mentally, from Reality. Instead of reveling in what is right before us, we jones after fantasies of the good life. This is the good life! Or, as Carly Simon sings, "these are the good old days." Nothing need be added because nothing is missing. Nothing. Very Zen!
When lost in the cycle of seeking, when tossed by waves of desire, breath is a lifeline. Focus on the rise and and fall of your stomach -- breathing in, breathing out. You don't have to seek to breathe; breathing just happens. As does your life. As does Reality. Right here, right now the breath of life, all of life, all in this moment free of seeking. Who could ask for anything more?
Experience is the Real Deal!
"Experience for me is the highest authority. The touchstone of validity is my own experience. No other person's ideas, and none of my own ideas, are as authoritative as my experience. It is to experience that I must return again and again to discover a closer approximation to truth as it is in the process of becoming in me."
-- Carl Rogerss
There's an acronym in business circles -- OPM. It stands for "other peoples money." It's suppose to be a smart way to grow your business. The problem is, as we've seen in the recent economic crisis, it doesn't always work. OPM is just a three letter abbreviation of a four letter word -- debt.
The same is true with OPE -- other peoples experience -- it doesn't work! You can be indebted to others for sharing their wisdom, but you can only really grow through your own experience.
Ideas, even your own ideas, as Carl points out, are once removed from experience. Ideas are cognitive. Experience is a whole mind, whole body phenomena.
What does this mean on a daily basis? Don't trust anybody! At least don't confuse their words with your truth. Great ideas, good intentions, and high falutin' theories are all well and good, but they are merely starting points, they are never the ultimate authority.
Legend has it that on his death bed, Gautama the Buddha's final words were: "Work out your own salvation, with diligence." Or, you know, the Hindi equivalent of that sentiment. He didn't expect his followers to take his word as gospel. He didn't want anyone to rely on anything other than their own experience.
And that's what I'm encouraging you to do -- don't place any opinions, holy books, expert commentary, or pithy sayings above your own experience. Test every hypothesis, every supposed-truth in the cauldron of life experience. Only if it survives the flames can you count it as real. And even then it is probably still evolving, or at least your understanding of it is.
It's enjoyable to read about life. It is challenging to write about life. But the only thing that's real is living life -- fully, consciously, openly every moment, every day. Do that, and experience will be the only teacher you'll ever need.
-- Carl Rogerss
There's an acronym in business circles -- OPM. It stands for "other peoples money." It's suppose to be a smart way to grow your business. The problem is, as we've seen in the recent economic crisis, it doesn't always work. OPM is just a three letter abbreviation of a four letter word -- debt.
The same is true with OPE -- other peoples experience -- it doesn't work! You can be indebted to others for sharing their wisdom, but you can only really grow through your own experience.
Ideas, even your own ideas, as Carl points out, are once removed from experience. Ideas are cognitive. Experience is a whole mind, whole body phenomena.
What does this mean on a daily basis? Don't trust anybody! At least don't confuse their words with your truth. Great ideas, good intentions, and high falutin' theories are all well and good, but they are merely starting points, they are never the ultimate authority.
Legend has it that on his death bed, Gautama the Buddha's final words were: "Work out your own salvation, with diligence." Or, you know, the Hindi equivalent of that sentiment. He didn't expect his followers to take his word as gospel. He didn't want anyone to rely on anything other than their own experience.
And that's what I'm encouraging you to do -- don't place any opinions, holy books, expert commentary, or pithy sayings above your own experience. Test every hypothesis, every supposed-truth in the cauldron of life experience. Only if it survives the flames can you count it as real. And even then it is probably still evolving, or at least your understanding of it is.
It's enjoyable to read about life. It is challenging to write about life. But the only thing that's real is living life -- fully, consciously, openly every moment, every day. Do that, and experience will be the only teacher you'll ever need.
Your Relationship to Reality
"Spirituality is our relationship with the reality that is before us at this moment."
-- Leonard Willoughby. Everyday Tao, p.161
Spirituality is not about beliefs. You can believe whatever you want, and neither the beliefs themselves nor the process of believing will add one wit to your spiritual standing.
Spirituality is all about reality. It is about your stance in, and interaction with, the reality of the now.
There are no secret doctrines to which you need to be privy, no esoteric practices that you must master in order to live the life of the Spirit. Spirit is all there is! You need only relate to reality as such.
If each and every Being is God, if each and every moment Divine, of what use are beliefs? Your joyous task, your play in the fields of the Lord, becomes merely perceiving the all in One, the One in all, and then acting spontaneously and accordingly.
What could be simpler? What could be more difficult?
Don't take my word for any of this -- try it. Experiment. Lay down your beliefs and be in the unadulterated now. See what happens.
-- Leonard Willoughby. Everyday Tao, p.161
Spirituality is not about beliefs. You can believe whatever you want, and neither the beliefs themselves nor the process of believing will add one wit to your spiritual standing.
Spirituality is all about reality. It is about your stance in, and interaction with, the reality of the now.
There are no secret doctrines to which you need to be privy, no esoteric practices that you must master in order to live the life of the Spirit. Spirit is all there is! You need only relate to reality as such.
If each and every Being is God, if each and every moment Divine, of what use are beliefs? Your joyous task, your play in the fields of the Lord, becomes merely perceiving the all in One, the One in all, and then acting spontaneously and accordingly.
What could be simpler? What could be more difficult?
Don't take my word for any of this -- try it. Experiment. Lay down your beliefs and be in the unadulterated now. See what happens.
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